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Saturday, June 17, 2006
Aise apni wife ho,
5'5" jiski height ho,
Jeans jiski tight ho,
Chehra jiska bright ho,
Weight mein thodi light ho,
Umar me difference slight ho,
Thodi si woh quiet ho,
Aise apni wife ho.
Sadak per sab kahe kya cute ho,
Bhid me sab kahe side ho-side ho,
INDIA ki paidaish ho,
Sas ki seva jiski khwahish ho,
Aisi apni wife ho.
Padosi jab baat kare to haath me knife ho,
Candle light dinner ho,
Dono me kabhi na fight ho,
Milne ke baad dil delight ho,
Hey PRABHU teri archane uski life ho,
Yeh kavita padhke sab kahe "Guru tum right ho",
Aisi apni wife ho.
Kaash yeh concept 0.000001 % bhi right ho,
Agar aisi apni wife ho to kya haseen life ho,
Har Kisi ki yeh farmaish ho, kudrat ki bhi aajmaish ho,
Khudah ke software mein bhi debug ki na gunjaish ho,
Ay kaash kahin to ek aisi paidaish ho,
Aisi apni wife ho!Monday, June 12, 2006
1. Search for a not-most-beautiful girl. Find a way to talk to her.
Finding a reason depends on your skill. You have to find a reason because she would never approach no matter how frustrated she is.
2. If you don't succeed got to step 1 again.
3. Start with some concrete point and slowly shift to her personal details.
4. Ask her for coffee like: "You are busy right?" She will say "No" and then "You don't like coffee?" No direct thing like "Would you please come for coffee with me?"
5. Asking for lunch: When she has finished her lunch, approach her and ask, "Had lunch?” She will say "Yes" Then say "Hey, you didn't call me".
Next day she will call you No direct pleading like: "Please have a lunch with me."
6. Well, how to ask for having coffee outside (in some café): Tell her that this coffee is not good. Tell some technical reason. Then tell her that that café nearby serves a damn good coffee. Next day either she will ask or you ask her in some indirect fashion.
7. When you want her to take on some outing..."You know last evening it was really a great fun. We all friends went to ABC park. It’s a beautiful place.. cool breeze.. Complete silence.. no clamouring.. No rush.. Wow..
We enjoyed a lot.” Hopefully next time she will ask herself to take her to that place, if she doesn't, ask "Hey lily, we are going to ABC park. Are you coming?” She will. No compelling.. Nothing..
8. If you don't succeed go to step 5 again.
9. When you cross the road, she needs help.. Just hold her hand and help crossing. This will be your first time when you are touching her. Don't be excited.. Pretend as if everything is normal. Now even after crossing the road don't leave her hand. Evening while talking. If she throws your hand away and gets serious Just get up and sit far from her and say "is that fine now?”. Show a bit of anger and make her realize that she is a very backward and has no sense of new society "Don't know in what era you are living".
10. If you don't get a chance to hold her hand, just be patient till you drag discussion to some Palmist's story.
11. Now 50% part is finished.
12. Keep on playing small tricks. Try insinuating thoughts into her mind:
"Aishe mat dekho..Pyar ho jayega..hehe:)(followed by smiles)".
13. rest is on you..
14. NEVER EVER SAY 'I LOVE YOU’. THIS IS THE MOST FATAL STATEMENT...IF SPOKEN BEFORE COMPLETE FLOURISHMENT OF LOVE. Theory: When you say the things like "I LOVE YOU"," I love you so much"," I can't live without you”.
It means you have completely given your self into her hands and you are on her sympathy now. She would never fall for you...and if u aren't rich she would never marry.."Tum bas ek friend ban kar rah jaoge"...Actually, The whole system is made up of small units having relation of master-slave.(as per Lacan) Once you propose or say the things like "I love you.. I can't live without you"..you become slave.
15. If you really want to admire(not adore) her: "Hey, pink color suits you. You are looking cute". "I like the way you say "oh. no""...etc etc.
"ADMIRE IN INSTALLATIONS".
16. On phone.. Always hang the phone before she does. "Hey, I was just thinking about you. bla bla bla...I have got some call We will talk in the evening/after some time". patches & updates will arrive soon...................